coketalk:

So yeah, Vajazzling exists.

This is another one of those moments where I’m jealous of all those Pasadena housewives who got to whore it up on the sunset strip in an old-school era when nobody had to get their shit waxed.

Those leathery bitches must be laughing at the sorry state of our scene. It’s not enough for us to pour a hot sticky mess all over our lady business to rip thick hairs out from the root, but now our pussies have to be dunked in glitter?

Swarovski crystals? Please. Like the sparkly shit you glue to your vagina needs fucking brand recognition. I blame Christian Audigier’s influence on popular culture. That motherfucker desensitized us all to the inherent tackiness of cheezy bling.

Remember folks, we still live in an era where it’s culturally acceptable to slice open your breasts and fill your guts with squishy sacks of silicone. Vajazzling is literally child’s play. I yawn at this shit.

Although I’ll have to admit, the first crazy bitch to get a sunburst pattern of crystals around her asshole will forever have a place in my heart.

Wow, Vajazzling really does exist.